Tak Pernah Berubah

Tempted to make a post in Malay but decided to hold off until later.

Tak Pernah Berubah, the title of the song by Suki Low (of One in a Million fame if you didn't already know). YouTube video of the song at the end of the post. Not sure if it's just me or there's really a hint of, for lack of a better word, poignancy throughout the song but relaxing nonetheless.

Never Did Change. I reckon that to be the correct translation. And I'd like to think that I never did change too; well, not over to the dark side that is. My view of the local academia remains: that a good percentage of them are selfish and avaricious people seeking office and high praises. But try forcing them back to reality and you'll see a showcase of 'faux intelligence'. In any case, I'll be facing this bunch of people in my thesis defence on September 3. Can hardly wait!

Anyway, I'm quite certain that I can finish the slides before Kak Mimi's engagement on the third day of Aidilfitri. Events such as this do make all the slogging worthwhile. After the defence, I'll look forward to Asyura's wedding on the 16th.

Yours truly with Syura and Kak Mimi. Note: this is 3 years old so what you see ain't what you'll get

Thereafter, interview by for a job with the Ministry of Health (nice way of saying government hospitals/public laboratories) in October. Lastly, a project report at Universiti Malaya in November organized by the Malaysia Toray Science Foundation.

For a moment, it's only natural to think that we have everything drawn out. Plan all we want but it's foolish to be too certain of anything that will happen in the future. The one who trusts in him-/herself will scoff at the notion that nothing is ever certain – or at the idea of a sovereign being – and human knowledge trumps everything.

James reminds that "you do not know what tomorrow will bring". And asks, "What is your life?" (James 4:13-17). Taken out of context, mockers will only be happy to say that it's the slogan of the unambitious. Oh well, I'll be the judge of that.

Stupidity: Things Above and Not Things Here on Earth

The things of God are stupidity to many. Nobody, of his or her own volition, seeks after God or things that please Him. If you’re that person, you can stop reading now. After all, if you’re looking for a cogent argument this isn’t the place. If any, only a simple faith exists. Many who argue against what I'm going to say (or type, for that matter) have already made up their mind, not in the least concerned about cogency and rigour, and I won’t bring the roof down doing that.

Think about it for a moment. If our value system is not shaped by the Bible (Matt. 6:19-24), the things we value or treasure consistently let us down when we seek our significance, or satisfaction, or security in those things. The energy spent in pursuing what we think those things will provide—happiness, security, satisfaction—consistently lead to failure. The pleasures we think will satisfy us never really do—at least not for long. In fact, they typically just increase our thirst for more. What futile irony!! Such irony is plainly the very fabric of life when it is lived independently of God.

J. Hampton Keathley, III
Resting in God’s Sovereignty

Christians or not, people stock up (rightly) to the point that these material riches become their only goal (wrongly). The “attainable” goal of a comfortable life. Nothing wrong, right? I put “attainable” because everyone thinks that once it’s achieved, we’d step back, sit down, and enjoy. But the fact is, will it ever be enough?

Now God and the Bible aside, I’ve heard on more than one occasion people who proclaimed: “there’s more to life than {insert your goals here}”. Sure thing. There’s more to doing research than to lose sleep over whether the neighbouring lab’s going to outdo and out-publish in a month’s time.

There’s God.

If only people would align their goals to God’s. Instead of asking, “What should I eat, wear, or the type of property to own?” asks, “What do I do with my gifts?” or “How can I bring glory to God?”

I’m perhaps the biggest hypocrite to be saying all these and echoing Paul, “the least and the most unworthy”. Somehow, the toiling and the sustained rush over the past months; plus the little eye-opening chitchats with driven folks did put into perspective the futility of it all when done to satisfy humanity’s benchmark.

What’s prosperity without a purpose? Self-glory is for the here and now. Said Solomon: Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done
    and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;
    nothing was gained under the sun

Ecclesiastes 2:11

I’m not going to change anyone. But I don’t wish to waste my time achieving everything, rely on my [self-perceived] great understanding + knowledge, giving in to the physical pleasures and contemporaneously bankrupting my spiritual life.

No, no. I’m not entering monkhood nor am I shunning the good things in life [that God has created]. All I’m saying is that I need to have my own convictions and not do as everyone else does.

It’s not easy to close my eyes and walk. It’s not too difficult not to peek either, or remove the blindfold and say, “Fine, I’ll do what I know best.”

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

1 Timothy 6:6-10 

If only the Bible hasn’t been relegated in favour of modern, up-to-date societal demands, or verses cherry-picked to fit [our goals and justify our actions] into the world (oh, we see this often among religionists, don’t we?).

I only hope and ask from God that more people will be like-minded when it comes to goals in life — pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. To serve God and not the gods of this world.

Asians in the States

*speaking [inaudibly] in the American accent*

Not sure why YouTube stopped sending digests on Jubilee Project. Be The Change is a timely reminder. And an important one too considering how much focus one puts on a single thing when there are many more things that matter.

So yeah, Be The Change. If I could just italiciZe the word "the".

Be The Change.

Enjoy.

*wipes saliva from lips*

     
         

Double Take (2): 2011 in 270 Words

More or less.

Not wanting to be finicky, 2011 has been a good year. Not great but it ain’t bad either. It’s taught me some valuable lessons and ways to handle... well, face setbacks and take it in my stride. Easier said than done, really.

This year saw the passing of some bad people, but I’m not holding my breath. The vacuum will always be filled and that’s how history always rivets me – there’s never a short supply of evil characters.

Tear-jerking YouTube videos are plenty this year and the most memorable one has got to be Stranger, again. To please some real-man-don’t-cry activists out there, maybe the theme of nice guys finishing last would besuitable.

Even the countdown to midnight puts into perspective the oft-heard expression “for every beginning, there is an end”. Hey wait! Every ending, it seems, is a new beginning. That said, the desire to go back to a certain date in 2011 and relive the moment is unmistakable.

All in all, the year’s been a love-hate ride (weren’t the past years similar?). Hate’s too strong a word. More along the lines of like-dislike.

The lineups for 2012 are: the general election and my school’s 160th anniversary homecoming dinner. Come to think of it, my life’s rather low-key, eh? Heheh!

Speaking of school, I think I should top the last post of 2011 off with a marriage proposal I saw a few days back. Dude’s from my school (no wonder he looks so familiar, must’ve seen him queuing up for the delectable food at the canteen) and I heard he’s made a name for himself right now. Way to go!

Happy New Year, people! Be blessed!
            

Righteous Among Nations

I'm so tired I can't sleep, and my eyelids they twitch.

So I thought I better do some reading to sort of slowing that overactive mind on overdrive for the past week. One thing led to another and now I got more intrigued; not because it's new but because of the details.

Being lazy to yak away, I decided to rehash that part I read. I realized it's on Wikipedia too.

You want to know about my motivation, don't you? Well. It is the kind of sentiments anyone would have when he actually sees refugees face to face, begging with tears in their eyes. He just cannot help but sympathize with them. Among the refugees were the elderly and women. They were so desperate that they went so far as to kiss my shoes, Yes, I actually witnessed such scenes with my own eyes. Also, I felt at that time, that the Japanese government did not have any uniform opinion in Tokyo. Some Japanese military leaders were just scared because of the pressure from the Nazis; while other officials in the Home Ministry were simply ambivalent.

People in Tokyo were not united. I felt it silly to deal with them. So, I made up my mind not to wait for their reply. I knew that somebody would surely complain about me in the future. But, I myself thought this would be the right thing to do. There is nothing wrong in saving many people's lives... The spirit of humanity, philanthropy... neighborly friendship... with this spirit, I ventured to do what I did, confronting this most difficult situation – and because of this reason, I went ahead with redoubled courage.

Another piece towards the completion of my learning puzzle readying for my trip to Oświęcim and Jerusalem. Not forgetting Washington, DC. All those places in, at least, 5 years time. Early preparations wouldn't hurt though.

               

The Loop Button

Free-verses are less restrictive and needs little distillation.

The loop function is activated

But really, it can't be turned off at all

It's one of those trips off the beaten track

Into the feeding ground of sandflies

Some say nurtured by the priest-doctor

All alone all along

I stumbled on all day long

Sometimes in doubt and in fear

Not wanting to suffer and trade my life so dear

To the terrifying curse of Kala-azar

The walking stick aids my wearied members

Rough basalt becomes my pillow

Phantom breeze whispers into my ears

Whilst the dew comforts me

Until next ray of sunshine imparts warmth

I awake to a million gnaws

And realize this place ain't Lilliput

These six-legged critters are starving

A bunch of toucans chirp derisively

and one lone toad croaks in agreement

The loop function is activated

But really, it can't be turned off at all

It's one of those trips off the beaten track

Into the proving ground of stealthy hunters

Some say trained by the Wolbachia warriors

  

White November: Recollection and Recounting de novo

Even if it's hot and humid here, Malaysians experience the occasional whiteout caused by a really heavy downpour especially now that the monsoon season is upon us. Elsewhere, it's pumpkin, candles, and snowfall.

September and October have said their goodbyes (good riddance!) and I'm welcoming November. And I can feel the noose tightening around my neck. Anyone realize that time somehow moves faster when we're hoping that they'd just slow down? Maybe it's just me dwelling in the past.

For so many reasons, I wish to be stuck in May and maybe, July. With each passing month, it becoming more and more difficult to complete this arduous journey. One made worse by the vista of decadence (huh?) and the filth emanating from it; all sustained by a stream flowing from that deceitful heartland (what?)

I can't think straight at the moment but my hope for November is... I wonder if there's anything I should look forward to.

The good feelings from six months ago? Is it the carefree days of June? Wait! The felicitous upshots of July? Those were the [more recent] days, and were being the operative word.

All I know is that the alarm has been set to go off at 8 and I have a huge amount of debt to settle – sleep debt accumulated from the past few weeks, that is.

     

Y2K 11-10

The Sturm und Drang of Occupied October
Should cause casual commoners like me to quiver
A nascent ripple waxing by the day
Swinging out in every cardinal point and Rome burns today

Oddly, there prevails a state of uncanny equanimity
Permeating the noetic sphere called the mental faculty
From the placidity burst forth the brilliant flashes
It becomes hard to secern excitement from madness

Day 3 if cogitation and getting nowhere
There’s got to be an answer somewhere, but where?
I’m stuck between that man-wrought cave of utter despair
and that doggone whirlpool of delusion and certain snare

The sum of 2 and 2
Summed up the world rotten through and through
I’m not without aspiration nor expiration
And can only hope to emerge unscathed from adulteration

One bittersweet summer repleted by burnt butterscotch
Dwindled away to the cold, carved pumpkins at the porch
The frost of Shackleton’s time will soon gnaw
at our extremities whilst we await the first snowfall.
  

Bloody Bullies

When Bullying Backfires: Asperger’s Student Voted Homecoming Princess

Ah, the kind of headline that almost always puts a smile on my face. There are a few definitions of bullying that I know of, but apart from the occasional teasing / name-callings, I wasn’t subjected to a daily torture – physical or otherwise.

We all grow up and become friends. Suddenly, we laughed about our parents’ names. Come to think of it, it was childish to 1) seek pleasure in calling a classmate by his father’s name and 2) react angrily when someone greeted our pops.

One of my favourite PSAs by JP

After growing some pubes and learning to respect the other person, we soon channel that effort into lively discussions with our teachers: tantalum digging, girls, etc. I guess I was lucky that I never encountered a violent bully trying to experiment inelastic collision with my head and the wall.

We've heard of worst cases both at home and abroad. I can never forget Phoebe Prince whenever the subject of bullying comes up.

Maybe I should be thankful that the strict discipline in school. Yes, I’ve been on the receiving end of the rod. Once when all 38 of us got caned for going too far on the decibel scale. Heheh!

But I’m not indifferent to bullying. I was 9, and still learning to make subjects and verbs agree. My cousin’s already in Australia with his parents.

“...great news here in Australia. I might be skipping a grade.” is one of the many things he wrote about in a Christmas card. He also described the weather in Adelaide and how much he’s learned in school. Ain’t that obvious, cousin? Even Singapore’s way ahead.

He didn’t tell me about the treatment he got whilst at school. Mum related the incident to me and somehow, [on hindsight] those bathroom scenes from Hollywood are so real. Anyway, they’ve already returned long ago after Uncle Vic finished his studies.

They all have fond memories of their time down under but I was particularly sore about the bullying and some bigoted twats calling out to them whilst walking home, “Boat people, go home!”

Halfway through the post, I stopped and searched myself against the actions that constitute bullying. Lucky I'm not one. Never was too. *winks*

Now for some in-game retribution. Mortal Kombat... Bloody, no?

     

I Still Remember

This time around I thought I should speak for myself. If 2 years ago I wrote about "us" remembering, I'm not sure if "we" was well-defined.

Ten years ago on this day (it's already night time here, a little past 10 pm), my friend mentioned something about a plane, a building, and an explosion he heard from another person.

"It must be some urban warfare but where? Fighting in the Kosovo War ended some time back," I thought to myself. I now know it ended in 1999.

It all became clear over the next few days and ten years on, who doesn't recognize images of smoke billowing from the World Trade Center or the clip where the plane slammed into the building?

September 11, 2001 meant different things to different people.

For me, it sort of renewed my interest in conflicts around the world and studying why people did it. What was going on in their head when they planned to make headlines and taking lives – sometimes their own – in the process? From Jonestown to Oklahoma City; Waco, Texas; Madrid; London; Mumbai; or Beslan, Russia, we've often asked why they did it. What drives them? I guess we'd never get a satisfying answer.

I have a folder in my computer full of pictures, tribute videos, recorded phone calls, and saved copies of websites detailing the chronology of events both in and outside New York City. I remember getting all teary watching one clip in the middle of the night and reading about Flight 93*. It goes without saying that I watched (and I know I have to) United 93 when it was released in 2006.

Life goes on, as it always does, and this day like many other dates, is a reminder of the evil that human beings are capable of. It is also one that highlights the tenacity of the human spirit in the face of a horrifying adversary.

Try as I may, I will never be able to comprehend, fully, the grief felt by those who have lost their loved ones on that fateful day. But Americans remember. The world remembers. I remember.

*I'm glad to know that this page is still available online.
____________________
I'm not going to try and justify the events that took place following 9-11 but I know that the whole world felt it. War isn't a beautiful thing and it affects everyone. It is depressing to know we have to tighten our belts to save for fuel.

Cheers and Tears

Preparations are underway for National Day as well as Hari Raya and Facebook is abuzz with updates by those on their way home. And non-Muslims join in the gaiety by posting wishes and tagging their Muslim friends.

On the other extreme, we learn of road deaths [and other mishaps] in the news and the newspaper.

The past few days have been wet and chilly with a brief period of sunshine. Still, I find it quite uncomfortable even if rainy days are great for slumber; its getting really moist in my room.

If anyone (me) thinks this small inconvenience is a pain, then wait till a hurricane touchdown. I'm sure most are familiar with Irene and the situation in the US East Coast (I prefer the alternate term Eastern Seaboard).

There you go, a pathetic attempt juxtapose the extremes. Imagine if we could take each person from both sides and cause them to switch places, I'm sure both would be really thankful. Since we can't do that, well, at least not putting people into a disaster-ravaged area, we can only encourage and help those who complain to see that "others had it worse".

Still, I fully understand the difference between saying something and then doing it. As long as it'll take, it's still possible. Gotta have faith, no? And a well-placed one too. That's when we know for certain that the light at the end of the tunnel isn't "a speeding train headed our way".

Let's rest on these:

What Faith Can Do - Kutless

Everybody falls sometimes

Gotta find the strength to rise

From the ashes and make a new beginning

Anyone can feel the ache

You think it’s more than you can take

But you're stronger, stronger than you know

Don’t you give up now

The sun will soon be shining

You gotta face the clouds

To find the silver lining
:

 

Chewing the Cud, Choking on Grass

Weekends never tarry. They come slowly and leave quickly every time. Just when I needed more time, a new day announces itself in the form of the time and date on the system tray. It was a balmy Sunday and there I was, hunched over the LCD reading – from bootstrap analysis to enteropathogenic E. coli. Those journal articles and web pages took about 5 hours to complete.

Now, I wouldn’t remember a single thing, much less understand what I was reading, if I didn’t punctuate those 1 – 6 pm period with some less demanding materials. I trawled the net looking for graduate schools offering doctoral degrees in varsities all over the world, stopping at Singapore, Ghent, Seattle, Oregon and somehow I got caught up in the breathtaking view of Montana.

Alas, that tiny but mounting desire to pursue a doctorate was snuffed out. To digress, my decision to jump into postgraduate studies in 2008 was because I felt inadequate as a graduate. It’s a deception for anyone to think that after three years, one is qualified and competent; not me and definitely not here in Malaysia. It’s purely for knowledge and to better train myself; which is why I wasn’t in a rush to complete everything in under a year.

Now when I’m ready to take my life as a student / researcher to the next level, I’m faced with the prospect of having to give it all up and settle for a job somewhere in the country. All I could hope for is that my government establishes (and broadens bilateral) ties with more countries as far as education is concerned.

That light at the end of the road (?). One evening on the North-South Expressway

From Sweden to Switzerland, scholarships are offered to students from a rather long list of developing countries and when you thought your country is there somewhere (owing to a number of high profile pacts with MIT, Johns Hopkins, and scholarships to Harvard), you’re stupefied to not see your country in it but your neighbours are there.

Maybe my government is committed only to world class (assuming the rest aren’t) education in renowned institutions and I’m better off applying here at home. Then it hits me: the selection process is shady and reeks of biasness.

Some would say to me, if I’m so good why don’t I seek out scholarships from my institution of choice? To which I answer, even if I know I’m damn good, how am I going to raise that sum of money for the flight ticket and the fees for the first term so I can get registered to be eligible? Still, many will come with many propositions without knowing the state I’m in. Also, I'm not one that will just settle for the next convenient pasture and do something I'm totally not interested in.

I’m in good spirit, still. One more channel to pursue: USM’s Academic Staff Training Scheme. Upon completion of studies, there’s a 7-year bond to the varsity. Ready for another bad news? The selection process is like what I mentioned before and I know who will be in the panel. Ah, life on Earth sure is colourful! Let’s hope when (if that happens) I get selected, I’d be able to charm them with whatever appeal that’s left in me – nothing much to begin with.

So, those research and sulking took all afternoon and come dinnertime, I was swallowing the spaghetti, mushroom and mussels. After that, it’s another few hours of protein folding, oxidative damage, and metering in photography.

Just before calling it a [backbreaking, shoulder-hurting, and heart-hairline-craking] day, I said “hey” to a friend on MSN only to get a cold response. Well, problems of the heart ain’t easy for some so I smiled, gave her my best, and said good night.

My obsession with the sun (sigh): One morning whilst cruising along Gurney Drive.

 So, here I am. I’m supposed to post something about the ocean, underwater trenches and a sinusoidal graph here but I think I’m no longer in the mood for that. Time to dream of shopping at the Portland Farmers Market and wander the streets of Bruges.

 

A ⇔ B and REM

I love you... that is if you love me too.

When I read that, I went, “What the {bleep}? Really?”

And then I realized that I shouldn’t be surprised by that. Judging by how things work today, there are many who’d subscribe to that. Well, I think it’ll be easier to count how the number of people who don’t operate in that manner.

I wonder what Amanda’s like. I haven’t “seen” her since last Wednesday but I had a less-than-lovely dream last night. I went at a thief with a hammer and he fired two shots at me; both found their way into my chest. Lucky for me, I lived to use a different approach the next time around.

Another warm Sunday afternoon and I’m going to take a nap after finishing the 4-minute clip on Buttermilk Fried Chicken. Do look up “foodwishes” on YouTube. You’d drool every time. I know I did, with a little rumbling in the tummy.

Note from a Math weakling: (material equivalence) A ⇔ B means A is true if B is true and A is false if B is false.

 

Whispering in the Dark

Hello World!

Ah, those two words marked my foray into the world of programming. Back in varsity, I’m presented with two choices for a compulsory subject: Calculus or Programming (in C++). Being the idiot in math, I’d naturally go for computer stuff. How wrong I was; to think it’s about writing a working program. We have to work out the mathematical formulae to calculate the value of some spheres and some stuff about progression. I wonder how I survived that one.

Oh, I’m getting pretty good at C++ now besides Visual Basic and Java. Thanks to the fantastic books by John Smiley from the library. The best thing is that I don’t have to cram everything in 14 weeks. Just go at my own pace in a "simulated classroom atmosphere"

Stock from stock.xchng

It’s 1:32 AM right now and I can hear the revving from a performance exhaust in the distance. Saturday nights are never old, are they? I looked out my window just now and pretended I saw that beautiful skyline of Portland, Oregon. I don’t know, besides aurora and some deserted highlands, I love looking at randomly-lit cityscapes with their reflections on the water. Call me short-sighted since Johor might look just as great at night when viewed from across the strait in Singapore. The Kuching waterfront too, for that matter. Still, I like the night time view of the Red Square in Moscow, New York, Tallinn, Chicago, Bruges, and many more places fitting my inadequate description. Speaking of New York, CSI:NY and The Apprentice did well to win me over; yellow cabs, dark buildings, dark orangey sky, and steam rising up from some manhole or pipe.

Anyway, if you’d rummage through my archive you’d see my other make-believe journeys to Vienna and my favourite places: Arizona, Colorado, Utah, and New Mexico; although I didn’t make a direct reference to them. Back then (and I still do), I was thinking about mountains, valleys, and plains.

Eyes are getting heavy. I’ve just finished answering questions on YAHOO! ANSWERS. Figured, earlier, that since I’ve got nothing to do, maybe I’d help the folks out in Biology but I ended up answering more questions in the Relationship section, telling smitten kids to go easy (you know what I mean), giving my two cents to lovelorn guys, and imploring pregnant mothers to stay off alcohol – sending them to CDC’s site on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders (FASD). Ha! What’s gotten to me? Too much damaging “answers’ on Y!A maybe? I'm not a pro and with failures of my own, I'm just another person who 'understands' what the other person goes through.

Time to turn in. Good night. Or спокойной ночи . Yes, I’m glad to announce I can read Russian now but I don’t understand [virtually] a word of what I read. I’d need Google translate for that. Learning the Russian alphabets is fun and easy. Try it sometime. Takes no more than 4 hours and a few hours each day, thereafter, to recap. Hope life's treating everyone well. I'm not feeling particularly happy but I hope I did some good for someone among the 6 billion. =)

 

Thinking of Me: Niceties

It’s almost lunch time and I left my water bottle at home. Either I’m getting old or my mind’s somewhere else. Or maybe, just maybe, you’re thinking it’s with someone else. All I think of, besides completing my thesis, is me.

I’m thinking whether my being nice and all could mock me one day. I’m thinking whether my being cordial with people could leave me high and dry. Was I being too nice? Should I be glad or feel plain stupid?

Not that I’m looking to change or anything like that. It’s just that I feel that nice people, or in my case nice guys, seems to be on the losing end. Knowing me, some might think I’m too obsessed with nigahiga’s Nice Guys or with Wong Fu Productions’ Just A Nice Guy. Fact is, I loved both the videos and I think there’s some truth in them. Not gospel but a ubiquitous occurrence. I’ll leave it to you to judge but do finish all three parts of Just A Nice Guy even if you hate Asians.

I know all too well about preserving what I have and getting all teary in quiet. I know the feeling of being used and left unappreciated. But I never forget the smiles and thanks I get from being myself, nice. At this point, you’d think I’m looking for recognition and accolades but I’m not. I’ll still do what I can for anyone who’d ask.

Then why feel bad, you might ask? Well, I suppose we can tell when someone behaves differently at different times? Say, Jim calls and texts when he’s bored, lonely, and in some trying situation. Then Jim couldn’t be bothered about you when he’s surrounded by all the good things.

Perhaps, Jim isn’t a very sensitive person and he truly appreciates the help rendered to him. Who knows, Jim isn’t someone who’s used to saying thank you or say something to that effect. After all, Jim is being himself and maybe the next Jim who comes along will be better. Still, there are Jims out there who think only of themselves.

As for me, I hope I’ll know what to do if that day ever comes. Anyway, time to send a friend to the bus terminal. And today's Friday... Movie night! In my room, on my laptop, of course.

Nice Guys finish last? I won't refute that.

Just A Nice Guy - Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

 

Xanthophobia and a "Dirty" Hashtag

Whilst the mainstream media is silent over (except to bemire) the BERSIH 2.0 rally, the World Wide Web is abuzz with news and updates on the rally planned for July 9. I no longer have a Facebook account but it seems that the rally’s gained a lot of support; more so after the police began arresting people linked to it.

On Twitter (at least on my update page), the hashtag #bersih appear every 10 minutes or so and looking up the tag updates on Google gave me a hearty laugh. Apparently, everyone has become more aware of what BERSIH is. Even if they don’t, they love poking fun at the way the police handles the situation. That’s because the rally’s T-shirt and anything yellow is considered illegal because they “promote” the rally and “incite” the people to join in.

Here are some that I managed to copy (I didn't go through every post to check for errors) but I must admit that #Egypt gets new post every few seconds:

Yellow Post-It notes will be confiscated on sight. Other colours may be allowed

Bumblebee told 2 lose his colours or "action will be taken within confines of the law."

Publishers & Print designers forced to work with C M K, as Y (Yellow) has been banned.

Lagu hit Coldplay "Yellow" diisytihar haram kerana mempunyai element subversif

[Coldplay’s hit song, Yellow, contained subversive elements and has been declared illegal]

Steve Jobs admitted that #Bersih is the main reason why Apple did not push for a yellow iPhone!

Digi (telco service provider) phone coverage will go down for a day or two because (sic) yellow man (Digi’s mascot) will get arrested for sedition

Saw a group of policemen at the fruits section. Apparently the lemons are under arrest for being yellow

Even the yellow lines on the side of the road in front of my office has (sic) been changed to the colour white

Mother bought unripened bananas yesterday. We’re so worried when they turned yellow this morning

Everyone from Rumah Kuning (literally Yellow House, a grouping based on colour) cannot go for Pendidikan Jasmani (Physical Education)

Ah bengs who like to dye their hair yellow are going be in trouble

Sometimes, our absurdity knows no bound. I suppose everyone else in the world is having a good time reading about it in the papers. At least many now knows what Article 10 of the Federal Constitution is all about. If you'd prefer something else, might I suggest to you the Universal Declaration of Human Rights?

“IS BERSIH A DIRTY WORD?”

More Pakatan lawmakers nabbed for Bersih links

Experts: Bersih T-shirts NOT illegal

 

This is Me: Take 2

That brings me to modesty, generosity, and aversion to rich people. Hold your horses. I didn’t say I dislike all the affluent people out there. If it were so, I’d be a sour grape. When I say modest, I’m not restricting myself to one meal a day. I’m modest, not a miser. I’m unwilling to spend a few hundred bucks to get a brace put on my tooth just so my incisor gets pushed a few millimeters inwards. If you don’t already know, I fell and chipped both my [central] maxillary incisors. Somehow, over the years one decided to grow outwards. I do go out for some nice food sometimes and some of the amount goes to some old man at the market.

I remember once when two kind souls offered to support me financially.

“How am I going to repay the both of you?”

“You don’t. When the time comes, do it for another person”, was the reply. I declined the offer. But I truly appreciate the thought.

It’s the same person who lent me a Biology reference book. Something that proved very useful given the fact that I don’t go for extra classes like my friends, or own a few reference books like some snob in school. I tell myself to show such level of compassion, and more, to others in need.

My aversion to rich people? How is it justified? It’s just my simple observation that those in the position to do/change things aren’t doing a dang thing. It’s always the middle-class people who gave the most (if you consider the percentage). And it’s always the same group of people you see in the papers. Well, you do see the rich people too; in a totally different settings. Handing out mock cheque dressed in their best; always inside some glitzy ballroom complete with cocktails, finger foods, and the press. I don’t care very much about all this I’m-richer-than-you affair but it pisses me to see these people flex their wealthy muscle and make the inferior ones do their bidding.

Once whilst on my way back from backpacking to Vietnam, I see this bunch of family kicking up a ruckus at the check-in counter. Well dressed, watches, branded luggage, and the unmistakable swagger. They were raising their voice at the Vietnamese officers in green for reasons only they knew. My guess? Seeing the amount of stuff they had then, I think they were unhappy at being stopped. The matriarch of the family was making her point, and she did it well, in a loud voice and flailing her arms about. And then turn to her husband uttering in Cantonese. Such insolence! I mean, it doesn’t kill you to be polite. And rules are rules, ma’am. The guys in green maintained their composure and tried explaining, only to get Dragon Lady into another tirade. During my time there, the people of Vietnam are to me a humble lot. Quiet. Hardworking. Polite. From the staffs in the bank to the mother and child in Ben Thanh Market. Need I say more?

There are always complaints from these people. Not that they should keep quiet all the time. I myself couldn’t stand bureaucracy too. But some things can’t be helped. Just live with it. And be understanding. You don’t start cussing if your chicken isn’t served in 3 minutes after you’ve placed your orders. When it’s served in the fourth minute, at your demand, you start cussing because it’s pink.

On my many blog hopping trips, I’ve come across both likeable and slap-able people; each on different ends of the divide. On one hand you have some thankful people and on the other you have some people who love partying and complain when things don’t go their way. All are fortunate enough to further their studies abroad.

I’d go on and on but I suppose you understand now, how touchy I can get with this group of people.

 

Benevolent Sexism

That, to some, also means chivalry.

God forbid that we should mistake acts of kindness and empathy for oppression.
When I’m out shopping with my partner, he always carries the heavy bags. He’s stronger than I am. He does it without thinking, and I always acknowledge his help. It’s what people do in relationships.

Mary Schneider's article Is Chivalry Sexist? reminds me of the time in high school, specifically during English lessons, where we'd start a discussion on various issues grouped under what I call the [all-too-common] battle of the sexes.

My little acts of chivalry wasn't directed at my other girl classmates. I mean, there's nothing that needs a second pair of manly hands... Ok, boyish hands. It was the teacher's laptop. Man, laptops produced post-Y2K (not that there weren't any laptops before 2000) were heavy. Anvil-heavy. Or books. Holding the door. You know, those things? I think I made a good impression on Mrs Gan and also the lovely Mrs Doreen.

Now, I'm not the teacher's pet and no, I don't think we have such a thing in school. The teachers and students here share a very special bond. We respect our teachers and they never condescend to us. We spoke at length, we joked and we laughed. And I've learned so much from Mr Ian Howell; from the Russian Tsar to Latin and French. That man is a walking encyclopaedia.

Speaking of school, I think all those titles and special status heaped upon many other schools in the country comes to nought seeing what goes on, on the inside, day in and day out. Alright, I'm being a little biased here but... it's true! LOL!

What about now? I think I'm more aware of who's around me, thanks to Form Six where we have girls joining us (we're from an all-boy school up until Form 5). There are times when the tongue needs a bridle. Or to keep a comfortable distance, physically. No more slaps on the back or a friendly jab at the ribs. Those little things that show respect and quell any uneasiness in the fairer sex.

Guess I'm saying that I'm not the little boisterous bast--- brat anymore. A fine, young man I reckon. *stroking my beardless chin* Aha! I'm such a swellhead!

 

The Rock That Is...

Did this for a friend some time back. Now when I'm down and out, strangely I felt it's now directed at me. As usual, click to enlarge.

I'm sure many can relate to this: that when things go wrong we start to go into fight-flight mode and refuse to look beyond the quandary we're in. It's just natural to do that; to ask ourselves if there are other solutions. And to come up with one if we haven't already done that.

Then it hit us. Let it be. Let God. Trust him to provide. Scoffers are going to say, "What? Sit and wait?"

I certainly don't mean that. What I'm saying is that whilst we're a fusspot, we have to really bring it all to God and trust Him to do what's best for us. What's more important, to let things fall into place according to His will.

Argh! Let's give it a try shall we? And who knows, in time, we'd be able to proclaim like the psalmist

I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Psalm 18.1-2

Edit: Someone led me to this. And of course, there are a few others too. What I did was just embed one here. Grace by Laura Story. Enjoy, people!

 

Reality Check

If the analytical scale needs calibration and correction factors determined each time a GC column is replaced, then I need a reality check too. I've risen too far, on a trip sustained purely by reverie. Time to return to solid ground, maybe?

Well, they say birds of the same feather...