Stuck in a Rut, I Went to Town

Need to break out!

Ever since the victory at Water-flu, I went back to the countryside and retired to a life of monotonous routine. Instead of growing tubers, weeding the garden, and tending to the chickens, I invested in some black and white seedlings sold under the trade name "Standard 102/102 Microsoft Natural *". I was told I'd reap the rewards in about 3 months from the day I finished planting them.

Daily, I obediently got up and selected the "seeds" to be sowed. This morning was a departure from the norm. I went to the town hall to support a fellow "farmer", also a war veteran, in his bid to obtain certification for his produce from two goodness-knows-who appointed officials.

Witnessed by representatives of the village chief and friends, he gingerly detailed his farming techniques and at the same time flashed rough sketches of the root system he'd made. Nobody knows if the occasional nods from the officials signaled their comprehension or an exercise to relief pressure on the neck.

I held my breath when the inquiry began. My farmer friend was quizzed about the Five Wives and One Husband **. One by one he answered them all until they came to the Husband. Try as he might, he couldn't seem to satisfy the inquirer. By now, even the cat that was lying by the wooden barrel began to walk away – uninterested.

The bell tolled and I guess the season's harvest wasn't quite what everyone was expecting. Apparently, some in the hall had already made up their mind on what they wanted even before descending upon our town. They wouldn't compromise. It doesn't matter that there was indeed a product. They were looking for a certain shape, size, colour, and weight.

A modern "reenactment" of that medieval scene at the "town hall"

Sadly, the colours olive, emerald, jade, lime, turquoise, teal, moss, chartreuse, pistachio, and avocado aren't green. See, he said green and they said, "Moss and teal". Never mind they weren't in agreement. The farmer's got it wrong alright.

Ah, soon I'll be sitting on that chair facing my own demons. When the time comes, I hope I match my shades of blue correctly. Absurd? You bet!

_________________

* Keyboard [layout]
** What, When, Where, Who, Why, and How?

Wednesday. The day I went and lend support to my friend who has to defend his thesis; an oral examination also known as - to be pretentiously genteel - viva voce.